With this in mind, I introduce to you all, a new version of a well-known Liverpool song, where all you have to do is ‘delete as applicable’ and you will be left with a song that fits in with your type of supporting!
Every other(Saturday/Sunday/Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday)’s me (half day/full day/leave work five minutes early/two days/weekend/full week)off
And it’s off to the (match/pub/Liverworld shop/front room/armchair/executive boxes/mate’s house with cable) I go
I like to take a stroll along (the Anfield Road/to the pub/the copious rows of merchandise/to the offy/the high street shopping/to my mate’s house)
Me and me old pal (Joe/Trevor/the missus/Tarquin/Spencer/the shop assistant/the Sky repair-man)
I like to see the (lasses with their red scarves on/32inch flat-screen plasma TV/dropdown screen/barmaid down the local/scores on teletext)
I like to (hear the Kopites roar/watch Soccer Saturday/get peanuts with the ale/hold the remote control)
But I don’t have to tell you that the best off all
Is when(we see Liverpool score/we win the first goal-scorer betting/we get to use a corporate box/we see Smicer subbed/we see we pay less that the Jones’ for our digital TV)
We’ve won the (English League/FA Cup/UEFA Cup/game against the Mancs/Goal of the Month competition) about (a thousand times/a million times/once/twice/a hundred times/I don’t know/pass)
And (Uefa/The FA Cup/Getting Sky fitted/finding a pub with cable/getting corporate tickets) was a simple do
We’ve played (some exhibitions in the FA Cup/on Sky lots/near my house one time/bloody terrible/some games that were only on digital TV)
We are the (Wembley Wizards too/second game on the highlights tonight/team in the prettiest kit/club with the best prawn sandwiches)
But when we won the (European Cup in Rome/Treble in that foreign place/Poll on ‘You’re On Sky Sports’/game of soccer)
Like we should have done (years before/every year/every week/all the time)
We gathered down (at Anfield/the local/in the front room/my mate’s house/at Liverworld)
(Boys a hundred thousand strong/me and my mates/me and my missus/me and my replica kits/me and the kids/just me/me and my credit card/me and my Sky dish)
To give the boys a (welcome home/rollocking/mouthful on 606/vote on the digital TV poll/bit more of my hard earned money/moan on Sky Sports)