Great, glorious, grateful, gallivanting, gruesome, weak, arseless, confused, confusing, on a beach since October.
Take Thursday. A very good European side with a goal advantage come to visit and batter us for the first twenty minutes. No problem. 4-1. Two goals from a man with one leg and one from the most unlikeliest source on the planet if you read some columnists. Sentences you never thought you’d hear Part One – Lucas Leiva took the game by the scruff of the neck and turned around a high octane game against Benfica. Good for him. Take note, Steven. You used to do that.
Hot on the heels, if ‘hot’ is the word I want, came Fulham, fellow UEFA semi-finalists but practically the walking dead thanks to having 55 games under their belts. Who are going to get the clean sheet, them or Benfica? Ninety minutes of attack v defence, none of the midfield goal scorers on the pitch, simple balls to their centre backs and fourth place can go and take a powder. In other news City score 11 in two games and a team who were relegated 24 hours earlier have reached the FA Cup Final.
We lacked Torres, of course, who is off to see a specialist but such are the times that it’s difficult to see through the smoke and mirrors. He was pointing at his knee in the first half on Thursday but it only became a problem once we’d guaranteed qualification. Had we played the semi final yesterday would he have been risked? Quite.
The League’s gone from priority to guaranteed European Cup football to nothing. Rafa has a history of throwing his eggs into one basket (and taking off his best egg thrower with the game still level) and now it the UEFA or bust. Maybe it’s even UEFA and bust. Nothing looks better on a manager’s CV than two European trophies in six seasons. Ask Spurs if they’d take that. Ask Real Madrid.
And yet, there’s still a part of me that wants him to prove everyone wrong. I love the man. I’ve said before that one thing that people tend to overlook is the fact that he’s still here. He could have walked out a dozen times by now but he wants to set things right. That shows bottle in the face of the owners, a hostile press (Me, Gary Lineker, a piece of two by four and a locked room. That’s all I ask) and moronic comments from other managers. Kevin Keegan, that loveable English manager would have long had the Anfield gates swinging on their hinges by now. Many will point to the pay off but does anyone seriously believe that he needs the money with Madrid waiting in the wings?
I bet Xabi will love that too.
Off the pitch Martin Broughton, the trouble shooters trouble shooter, has been brought in to secure external investment with the club looking for £600m. The arrogance of the price is outstanding. ‘We’ve ballsed it up and are STILL looking for a profit. Everton won’t like that’. Is Purslow now in charge of the stationary cupboard? I think we should be told. Of course, it’s only in the summer where we’ll see the total damage. Don’t expect Mrs David Villa in Liverpool One just yet.
With the League now over and the UEFA undercard on the agenda it won’t be long before the ins and outs start. I can’t see many ins but Aurelio’s on his way and Insua’s tired and lacking confidence. I’d like to see more of Agger there but it’s embarrassing that we’ve run out of left backs. We need another striker (let’s hope we don’t need two) too which I assume would be Jokanovic.
Some can’t wait for the season to end but August may be even more depressing. I’ve no idea what team Gary Megson is going to start with on the first day but I hope Kevin Nolan’s fit.